Here's to the Sliver

This view is exactly what I see when I look up while sitting in my back patio. Just a sliver of sky between my building and a brick wall, interrupted by a loose power line. In NYC I am spoiled for having this, and even pay quite a price for it. Funny, in a way. I really do appreciate it though, and after a long day of work today I cracked open a beer and sat back here for a bit. Looking up at my sliver made me think of the rest of the world, and I couldn't help but think about how much I haven't seen of it. Luckily I hope to have about two-thirds of my life left to see more.

Going back a step, yes...I said work. After 10 months of unemployment I got a job in print photo production...and as many of you are fully aware, have had quite a time trying to adjust. There have been meltdowns, panic attacks...I am self-proclaimed stressorexic, if you will. I have planned escapes from said job and the city, as I often tend to do when faced with big change. I think it's in my nature to constantly think of the "what if" and ponder what else I could or maybe should be doing. And I may in fact leave, and truly feel in my heart that I should step back from city-life for awhile. However, me knowing myself knows that will still require a ton of planning. I wish I were more of a risk-taker. I wouldn't do it to run away from my problems, and I want to stress that. I'm always curious about experiencing other places, and I'm the only one who ends up preventing it from happening. I guess maybe that's the opposite of running from one's problems. Maybe I just create my own conflicts by staying in one place for too long.

A friend recently asked me what I would do if I could do anything I wanted - money aside. I said: "fly planes and own horses". This is completely true...but do I need planes and horses to be happy? Most certainly not. I don't think that "things" make us happy in the long run, and most of the people in my life seem to share this belief. Happiness is the most simply complex thing that I can think of...well, that and love...but that's another post for another time...

Interdependence Day?

In the U.S., Independence is celebrated once a year as one of ten bank holidays; A day to gather with people, eat, drink, blow sh*t up, then relax and watch fireworks. What I’m interested in on a smaller and slightly more selfish level is the question of what it is to be an independent person, because I think as humans, we’re actually a nice balance of interdependent. Therefore, to declare confidently, “I’m independent” is, in a way, a generally thoughtless statement when you think about it. If we were all completely and honestly independent, we’d be lost. By definition, to be interdependent is to be mutually dependent. I guess I just think it’s kind of funny that a holiday celebrating independence is typically spent gathering in large crowds, often on the turnpike...in minivans. I know, I know...The Independence Day we celebrate is of course more about being Independent as a nation, and the birth of Democracy. I’m not attempting to reinvent the wheel or anything, but in some ways I think it would be interesting to at least recognize the fact that nothing has ever truly been accomplished independently. In order to bring about change, whether positively or negatively, we have to come together as a mass of people working together towards a common goal. On an individual level, we need relationships with other people for a multitude of reasons. Without these relationships, we become mentally impaired. Just something I was thinking about, whether it’s ridiculous or not. More than anything, I’m happy to see people using the day as a way to spend time with others, recognize the good things we have, and “just be here now” as a good friend reminded me earlier. So Happy Independence Day!....just don’t be afraid to admit to at least some balance of dependence. It’s OK.